Lyf it is!

Disappointments totally change the whole definition of LIFE!!

How conveniently we shift from Life is Beautiful to Life is a Bitch! Don’t we?

For instance,

I didn’t wanna fail my chemistry xams in school, didn’t expect my mum to read my personal diary in the 11^th grade, I certainly didn’t expect to get heartbroken, as if I expected to go off to sleep after  chugging 4 beers, especially after deciding that iam gonna party hard after getting drunk!! And the “I didn’t expect” list is very long so chuk that.

Its funny that everytime I got or get into a problem, the very first question that I ask God is, Y only me??? What have I done?? Pichle janam ka badla pichle janam main hi lena thana… ab kyuu??

Then comes the whole healing process…I mean, gloomy days hover, sad senti songs become your best friends, you get into depression, hibernation, isolation, put on weight etc etc…

So just to keep myself on track, I decided to deviate myself a little bit and pushed myself to start thinking the other way round.

For instance, I imagined myself never failing in the chemistry exam. Guess what I saw?? I saw being aimless and without passion, hence a loser in life. Because I didn’t fail, I didn’t have the  zeal to become a winner and overcome failure. Similarly if I wouldn’t have got caught red handed, I would have never known what fear is. Nothing would have scared me, then how could I have felt what relief was??  Well getting heartbroken was not what I wanted to get into but ya ofcourse again I would have never felt pain and certainly pleasure and happiness would have been outta my my dictionary. If I wouldn’t have gone off to sleep after getting drunk then I wouldn’t have known what HANGOVER was… lol! :P Life looked bland!!

I answered my own questions and things fell into place all by themselves petting my disturbed peace of mind. Hope it brings some peace to you as well. J

This is LIFE, more or less like a train.. But each and every compartment, from the sleeper to the 1^st ac is equally important to reach your destination. And that’s how it is, scary yet fun.

So saying that LIFE IS SHIT would not be wise…It gives you alotta shit, but it totally depends upon you, whose shit you can or wanna  deal with and whose shit you wanna catch and then throw back saying “IN YOUR FACE LOSER” :P

Cheers! <3

Talk Of The Town!

Just turned on the TV and every channel I flipped through, has just one person all over. Guess who?? Ofcourse the talk of the town, Anna Hazare…As if forward messages were not enough. ;p No doubt the man certainly deserves some good amount of appreciation. After all, he is following the Gandhian principle, how can he not be supported?? Especially when he is following the footsteps of our father of nation because of whom our country is so called “Free”.. :p

Seeing the widespread support received by the campaign for the Jan Lokpal Bill, I see a good cause being raised. India will shoot up to become a developed country if the black money will be brought back. Going by the exact figures, 1456 lac crores is a lump sum amount isn’t it??? I see well being and a tremendous rise in the financial graph.

But the question that is constantly running through my head seeing the hypocritical people is, are these supporters really up for the movement or are they just blowing smoke???

I mean no offence to anyone though, since it’s a very sensitive topic but my mind waver having been brought up in an environment where parents fulfill their kids wishes by paying an extra penny. Not that their kids wishes couldn’t have been fulfilled by the exact amount of payment, but u know how parents are?? Their heart's melt and so they don’t take any risk as far as their kids are concerned . Leave that, we as kids get our projects made, bribe our college peons for attendance issue, bribe guards and servants to not complain about us and keep our secrets. However silly that might sound but the discerning truth is that yes, it is all a part of corruption. We ourselves, are all corrupted.

Infact how far is it true that Anna himself is clean?? (Oooops! no offence people i repeat!) :p But seriously has he always followed the right path?? Who knows!

So how are we standing today shouting out loud to stop it when we are the only ones responsible for its origination.

Are the people who are very conveniently trying to voice “Anna’s”  opinion by strongly supporting him aware, that when their past records will be taken into consideration, they might be the toppers of the list having the names of the corrupted people?

Will they be the same people who are screaming out loud anti corruption slogans then,whose truth is yet to be unfolded??? Are we ready to give up on everything and start with a scratch??

Phewww! My questions are neverending…

Iam  just a curious little girl and a member of the society who is juggling with her thoughts  but is  sure about the positive outcomes that the cause will obtain…

Peace Out

J

DEPARTURE!!

Holaaa!! :)

After a really long time iam  finally getting to blog… Courtesy,  WORK! Lol

Never really thought it would make me that busy or rather  I would make myself that busy considering how lazy iam.. :P

Anyway,

If i am asked to describe the past few months of my life, I would say, “Do u want me to write a book on it”?? Yes its really long but just in few words, it would be, surprising, shocking, hectic, exhaustive, stressful, heartbreaking and learning. But one thing that totally subsides them all is FUN. After all the whining and sulking about the work pressure and yearning for Sundays upto the extent that I had even started typing Sunday on all my login passwords,I know crazy it sounds but it is the truth, I was outta my mind and all I wanted was a good sleep.

But as it is said, “ as you sow so shall you reap” and so my hard work finally paid off. Now I wouldn’t wanna list down my achievements down here but yes Appreciation is what everyone wishes for and that was my biggest Achievement. Besides if you have awesome bosses and colleagues, its like a cherry on the cake. :D

Never thought that a five day sojourn would make me turn over a new leaf.  I don’t run away from work anymore. I know going by my last blog I would sound like the biggest hypocrite alive but I didn’t mention EXCEPTIONS!! Did i?? :P(Grin)

No seriously, back then I was scared infact, shit scaredddd but that was only until work was not fun.. And now that I had just begun to settle down with my new life, there comes the alarm, WAKE UP TIME!! Come back to college. Errrr! Are you serious???

College after 8 long months….i don’t understand why am I getting cold feet when all these months all I wanted was that college should get started asap.. :((

Its Departure time now and i have to get ready to board the next  chapter. Goodbye has always been so hard for me and yet again unwillingly I have to bid goodbye. And for a matter of fact, whats so good about goodbyes?? It always hurts.. hmph! 

So, friends I would suggest never settle down for anything because every event is just a chapter of your life’s book. Nomatter how beautiful it might be, it always ends, as the coming new chapters are far more better and the closure is the BEST! 

Before I end this , i would like to thank everyone who has ever been a part of my life. If you wouldn't have been there, my chapters would have fallen short of one color and it wouldn't have been that beautiful.

So all the best to everyone in all your future endeavours…

HAPPY FRIENDSHIP DAY!

LOVE

21 an age or just a no???

Soon I will be turning 21 and I am already on tenterhooks wondering whats lies ahead???

How good were those times when the thought of birthdays excited me… Planning for  parties a month in advance and dreaming about the gifts I would get while declaring to the whole world about my fast approaching birthday even when it was a month away…

But now if I declare to the world about my birthday, I would be putting an axe on my own feet. Y?? Obviouslyy, because people these days wish later but the first and foremost question that comes slapping hard across your face is “Dude where’s the party”??? AND OFCOURSE YOU END UP BEING BROKE!

What’s really bothering me now is not how I will be sheding out my pocket rather that’s the last thing running through my head at the moment. What really haunts me now is, my future, which is already giving me nightmares.

Entering the graduation year is no more a happy feeling as i had imagined while in the  first year…

Although I still have time to enjoy life but lets not forget that time travels at the speed of light and besides, enjoying is what I have been doing all my life..

After having an interrogation with the unbiased myself, I have come face to face with the  sour truth… The truth I wish I could deny but it howls out loud and clear, the fact that I am an ESCAPIST.

Whenever in school or college I was given some work I used to procrastinate, manage to get it done from somebody or simply run away from it.

Now lets play the blame game here. Yes u can say that partially my upbringing is responsible for the same.. Me being the youngest member of the lot was always pampered and was never forced upon anything. Any difficulty in my life was either my dads,mums or if not them, my sister’s responsility. Spoilt kid of the  highest order. 

                                                           

21, be it age or just a number is both scaring me to the core as it only reminds me of the little time that lies with me to enjoy life.

The negative and the positive self talk is brawling inside my head as Iam struggling hard to get  prepared to throw myself into the REAL WORLD.

The world which is full of mean and dominant people. They are the buthers in disguise who slaughter you slowly and cunningly as they  welcome you with their deceiving looks. This world my friends is the CORPORATE WORLD.  The world where everyone’s illusory expectations get shattered as none conform to them. Reality is viewed through the constricted prism of their egoes.

This is the world which I am soon going to enter, which is why, I abhor adding one year to my age and I just don’t wish to grow up anymore.

Am I ready to face the world? Will I be able to face all challenges put infront of me? Will I be able to handle the work pressure? Will I gel along with the people out there?

The questions are never ending, They seem to increase over time. Time, which is not in yours, mine or anyone’s hands. I yearn to go back to those carefree days where life was all about any and everything except taking a responsibility.

As I go into the flashback of the good times spent, the clock strikes 12 breaking my attention, bringing me back to reality. Oops, I just turned an year older.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!

J

F for Future…What else did you think?

Seeing the amount of modifications and remixes happening these days its not shocking to come across the Alphabet song which goes like A for A#ss, B for B*st^&d, C for Ch*t….and so onn…

If I go back and rewind my life by 10 years, I will exactly be half my age..10 year old to be precise, studying in the fifth grade and at this point of time in the month of june, probably struggling with the completion of my projects.. Yes now I realize they were all useless. I don’t remember a project which proved to be beneficial to me..

I could have utilized my time  in other stuff rather than wasting on my summer homework.. Anyway by- gones!

But what is hard to believe is back then when I would have been asked by my teacher, name the first word which strikes your head when I say F, I would have said Fish but now if I will be asked the same thing, then hell obviously it would be F*#k..

Not because it’s a normal slang these days and yes people say it to sound COOL too, but because its stuck to my head and mouth.

Today even a little kid of age 8 knows this word. With every new generation things change. Just like our parents get surprised seeing the pace at which we change our boyfriends and girlfriends, we too get surprised how kids  in school now have a blackberry and what all dirty things they get involved into. I mean this is so bloody unfair!!! I got my first cell phone in the 11^th grade only because I scored above 80% in boards(that was the condition put infront of me).. And I see my cousin who is in the 8^th grade at the moment having a blackberry already. Dyam I envy him..

This is the new trend and if I revolt against it, I would certainly be the ODD one standing out.

Just like our way of living is unacceptable to our parents, iam sure the very same way our parent’s behaviour must have annoyed our grandmapa nomatter how many times they say ‘Ki hum apne mummy papa se itna darte the and aisa waise kuch nhi karte the’..(Bullshit)

And its but ofcourse we will say the same things to our kids but the truth is, they will only do what they wanna do like the way we did and what the fashion speaks during that time.

The challenge lies within us, how we can skillfully convince someone to mend his/her ways if we think they’re going wrong.

Everyone knows the difference between right and wrong just like we knew or our parents knew but we still deliberately made or make mistakes.

What is important is, that if we don’t make mistakes then we would never know what is wrong and if we don’t get to know what’s wrong then we would never strive to work for the better. Hence its important to make mistakes!
So those parents who are scared about their children’s future then just CHILLAX! Cuz they would eventually know whats right for them. All you have to do is guide them right and support them during their bad/weak moments...

LOVE & PEACE!

SIYA- The DON!

Three years its been perfect, you and me so charismatic,

Not knowing whats comin next, making things lunatic.

The joy given by your soft touch kisses away with time,

You’r nomore the same Ron, no longer seem mine.

You decided to leave me all of a sudden, I cried and begged,

I lost my conscious and found myself in the hospital bed.

I kept hallucinating you, but you were nowhere,

You’ve started enjoying your new world somewhere.

Eight months had passed by but the gloom was stagnant,

The season didn’t wanna change as if autumn was permanent.

But as its said all good things come to an end.

So that doesn’t mean my story wouldn’t take a bend.

Thereby comes Chuck, my new neighbour.

He seemed cute, so was worth the labour.

Spring ran over autumn and life started to go on smoothly,

He was my new sweetheart and I,  his lovely.

Problems did come ,fights made me numb,

But I bought all his excuses and pretended to act dumb.

I finally gave up on him as I got to know of his crime,

He is not a one woman man, he likes to multi-time.

I was shattered cuz I loved him, leaving him was a pain,

Revenge was my new motive, I couldn’t see myself in vain.

Heartbreak the reason for my paranoia,

I dated several men and gotta a tag “Female Casanova” ;D

I began to enjoy being savage, I still carry the tag along,

All of a sudden Ron comes back, thought he would take lifelong.

He say’s he’s sorry and regrets for hurting me,

Tears rolling down his cheek, nothing was bothering me.

You were everything to me then, my world my Ron,

Ur too late now, haven’t you heard about the new “DON”? ;D

U=Me

I am amazed how u cajole me by saying we are not different souls,

Even though I know we stand at complete opposite poles.

Your one glimpse makes my heart beat so fast,

That the best pacemaker when in competition stands aghast.

Love is so pure and so divine,

That when it happens, ur eyes glitters with a bright shine.

To me u mean the world nomatter wat I am 2 u,

Ur thoughts keep hovering me, I guess they are stuck with a glue.

Sometyms I wonder, where were u all this while,

But who cares now, u just give me a reason to smile.

I keep imagining what my eyes will see,

When your face will be before me.

Baby I am normal, I may feel insecure,

But these feelings get jolted cuz ur love gives me the strength 2 endure.

When I feel lonely and the pain makes me weep,

U come like an angel and make me fall asleep.

U treat me like a princess, u think iam naïve,

My hand in your hand will surpass every battle, its stronger than a bee hive.

:) <3